i was on the phone
asking questions about the stage set-up, commenting
on the size of the venue, marveling at the merits of
a set list that changes every concert, feeling refreshed,
redeemed, and normal because i don't know eddie vedder's
second cousin's dog's squeaky toy's name, when it happened
--a sleight of hand, a twist of fate, and boom!
the talk turned to u2.
*sigh* so we're trading pj boots for u2 ones now.
but i keep thinking to myself that i haven't murdered
anyone and my thesis did get done...eventually, and
although my little bank account gets laughed at by all
the show-off bank accounts with positive numbers, i am
not starving and my family is not needing of the essentials.
but mostly, i keep thinking that for one moment (in a
sleight of hand, if you will) i can have what the
romantics and the transcendentalists have bragged about
for ages. i can have a sip from the jug of the nectar
of the gods. for one brief, human moment in time, as
the crescendo reaches its peak, i can have heaven--
and then go beyond.
and then i think to myself, that Can't be so bad.
you know?
twist of fate,
elena
-------------------------------------------
Bend me, break me, any way you need me
As long as I want you, baby, it's alright
"I Think I'm Paranoid" (Garbage)