IN DEFENSE OF CALVIN THE GREAT

J ([email protected])
Tue, 10 Nov 1998 17:54:00 -0800 (PST)

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> Wirelings
>
> I have always tried to come up to the defense of people who I feel
> have been unjustly flamed. I am of the belief that man in inherently
> good, so I think that deep inside Calvin the Great is a nice guy
> (although it is very hard on my part to try and believe this). I came
> up to Donadel's defense recently, but Calvin is a different case, he
> is really hard to defend because his actions are almost inexcusable.
> I used the word "almost" because here are possible excuses:
>
> 1. Calivin went home one day finding his wife in bed with another
> man. He was too chicken to do anything, he cried and walked to the
> nearest internet cafe and he let out all his rage to an unsuspecting,
> innoncent posting on Wire. So if this is the case, let's not be too
> harsh on Calvin.
>
> 2. Calvin had a very battered childhood with his step parents
> sexually and physically abusing him. It was in the early 80's and his
> step parents always listened to th October album. One time Calvin
> asked "What are you listening to daddy?", then his dad replied "Well,
> it's October from the October album you dumbass! For that I will beat
> you up and molest you everyday for the month of October!" Thus,
> Calvin is greatly traumatized by this. One and a half decades later,
> Calvin still remembers. Does this pass a a good possible explanation?
>
> 3. Calivn used to think "October" was a ballad so he played it to the
> girl he was courting whose name happened to be Gloria. Sadly enough
> he thought wrong and the girl turned him down because he coudn't tell
> what a love song was. He did the same thing to many girls and got
> turned down. He never got a girlfriend. Calvin tried to become a
> priest but was kicked out of the smeinary after insisting that the
> whole "OCtober" album were gospel and church songs, and upon insisting
> that every song be played in mass. Thus, "October" brings back bad
> memories fro Calvin.
>
> Well, these are three possible reasons so far and I have many more in
> my mind but I'd rather not waste Wire's space. I mean you all get the
> idea, right? So let us not be so evil to Calvin because maybe he is a
> lot more trouble than we all are and that Wire may have been his
> outlet for his unfortunate life. Let us help Calvin, let us all be
> his shrinks, let us give him a drink....
>
> Cheers,
>
> J
>

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